For a full list of the current Growing Families International curriculum and other resources, please visit: growingfamiliesusa. From Dr. Derek: We started implementing the principles in Baby Wise with our 4th baby unfortunately we did not learn them before. What a difference it made to our family. Our first child was a demand fed baby and it was a nightmare.
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It was a fair year. The Olympics were held in Beijing and Michael Phelps became an international celebrity. The Indian Space Research Station has a win with Chandrayaan-1 whilst elephants and terrorists rampage across the country killing many hundreds of people. President Obama is elected into office. Fidel Castro resigns. Theoneste Bagosore is convicted and sentenced to life imprisonment in Rowanda for genocide.
Israel and Hamas fight And a young, naive woman is The year was And a young, naive woman is pregnant with her first child. She is unsure, lacks confidence and wants to be certain she does the best job for her unborn child. Yet there are a great deal of books, resources and information - which ones to start with? Which ones to trust? So she turns to older, more experienced mothers who all but thrust this book into her hands and begin making the promises. Your child will sleep through the night at eight weeks if you follow this book.
Your child will be settled and happy. You will be a good mother. The book is full of advice. Not just advice, but research! It must be right! It all makes sense now. Parenting will be a breeze. The book has told her everything she needs to know. That way leads to folly, trust us instead! Your baby will cry, but mostly this will be to manipulate you. You must be firm, even if you want to give it a cuddle, this will only let the baby win.
Routine, routine, routine, that is the only way to go! Children must sleep in their own rooms. November arrives and her child is born. She tries. Lord knows, she tries. People tell her he is hungry and should be fed. They must be wrong. Babywise had told her that he needed to feed every four hours. Demand feeding would destroy breastfeeding, spoil him and have him feeding from her constantly until he controlled her completely. Despite having a natural, drug-free, complication-free birth, they keep her in hospital for five days, refusing to let her go home because she is clearly depressed, not coping and struggling to care for her newborn who begins losing weight, cries inconsolably and struggles to settle.
Eventually she signs herself out of the hospital. Her breastmilk supply is limited, the baby restless. She and her husband spend countless nights pacing the halls trying to settle their little boy. Soon he stops looking into hers. Eight weeks come and go.
The baby cries all night still. The mother has failed. She is a wretched creature. A terrible mother. It was all a horrible mistake. Maybe the book is wrong? Maybe she should feed whenever he cries? Maybe he could come into her bed occasionally? Sometimes he pushes away from her, keeps his eyes averted, scrunches up his little face in anger, then he flips and clings to her, feeds constantly, wants to sleep only in her arms. The baby is so unsure in his attachment to his mother.
He is a baby in distress. The book was right all along! Now thoroughly despairing, depressed, unconnected, she begins needing just one beer to make it through lunch time. Then she needs a beer to make it through to bedtime as well. Eventually, help is sought. You need to refresh. He needs consistent, affectionate nurturing. The advice sounds good. The baby is to be given rest, love and attention. Slowly the months slip away. The baby learns to cuddle.
The baby learns to laugh and giggle. The baby learns kisses and snuggles. The mother eventually gets better, begins enjoying parenthood. She learns to play with her child, interact with her child, enjoy her child. She can see now what this book lacks. She sees that it is so concerned about structure and discipline and not love - the greatest Christian principle of them all. It pits mother and baby against each other in a nonexistent battle for control.
It is parent-focused with unbalanced, incomplete data and research. It provides no unbiased advice, advocates no nurturing, divorces mother and instinct. The mother wants those first four months with her son back. She desperately wishes she could have them returned, change them, be the mother HE needed instead of the mother she was "educated" to be.
But they are not innocent either. They have published this book. The information is careless and their opinion is raised to that of gospel. Scientific research is cherry picked, or in some cases outright misleading. At the end of the day, though, the mother has won. She gave birth to a second son. When he cries, he is comforted. When he is hungry, he is fed. He snuggles his head into her neck and gurgles when she presses kisses into his.
She is happy. She is in love with her two boys. She is the mother she wants to be. She likes it that way.
Similar authors to follow
The personable parents of two daughters, they were well received. Their church and its high-profile pastor, Dr. John MacArthur, were well-respected around the world for the popular "Grace to You" radio program and for Dr. The co-founding couples also withdrew their support. In , the Ezzos began marketing secular parenting books whose content mirrored their church material. On Becoming Babywise, often nicknamed simply Babywise, is the best-known of that line.
On Becoming Babywise
It was a fair year. The Olympics were held in Beijing and Michael Phelps became an international celebrity. The Indian Space Research Station has a win with Chandrayaan-1 whilst elephants and terrorists rampage across the country killing many hundreds of people. President Obama is elected into office.
The book was published in The infant-rearing investigation the Ezzos conducted was performed by GFI and not published or subject to peer review. The book justified the act of leaving a baby to cry alone by comparing that choice to the crucifixion of Jesus: "Praise God that the Father did not intervene when His Son cried out on the cross. A pediatrician for less than a year, Bucknam first heard of the Ezzos while taking a class for new parents. He has been described in Babywise materials as a faculty member of the University of Colorado School of Medicine , but Christianity Today wrote that "three sources" at the medical school confirmed Bucknam had never been hired as faculty. Further editions of the book were published in , and Changes in the later editions include removing the assertion that the risk of sudden infant death syndrome SIDS is not heightened by placing the baby to sleep on its belly, and removing the notion that feeding the baby whenever it appears hungry will give the mother "an abnormal hormonal condition" which could lead to postpartum depression.